Sitcoms are a reflection of their times. The jokes that passed as acceptable on TV in the eighties could be downright blasphemous these days, and the same thing will happen with contemporary comedies in a decade or two. It’s inevitable. However, there’s a line between what’s okay and what isn’t – and that line has remained unchanged since the origins of television. In some cases, Everybody Loves Raymond crossed that line.
I’m a fan of sarcastic humour. Seinfeld is pretty much my favourite show – and everyone there is the very definition of an awful person. However, Raymond goes a step beyond that, being mean for meanness’s sake. That’s why it’s easy to see why some aspects of the show have aged like the finest milk.
Now, all of this doesn’t imply that Everybody Loves Raymond is a bad show. That’s not the point of this article. What’s undeniable is that, deep down, some things about the show – and how it portrays its characters – can be just weird. Without further ado, here are four reasons why Everybody Loves Raymond aged poorly.
4. RAY AND DEBRA’S RELATIONSHIP
Why Everybody Loves Raymond Aged Badly
The relationship between Ray and Debra, intended to be the heartwarming core of the show, is shockingly toxic by today’s standards. The two constantly bicker, undermine and irritate one another in excessively mean ways all for some phony laughs. Worst of all is that Ray is usually the one to blame in most scenarios.
When you make the main characters unlikable, you have to make it so they’re unlikable to the rest of the characters in the series – not for the viewer. Again, that’s what Seinfeld does. Ray frequently lies to and manipulates Debra, at one point even taping over their wedding video just to record a Super Bowl match.
3. UNLOYAL TO THE END
Why Everybody Loves Raymond Aged Badly
Picture Homer Simpson: a bumbling fool who always manages to make the lives of everyone surrounding him all the more complicated. However, at the end of the day, Homer is also a dedicated family man who loves his family – and his wife – more than anything. These are “redeeming qualities,” also known as “things Ray Barone lacks.”
Ray was unfaithful to Debra on more than one occasion. Granted, he never outright cheated on her, but that wasn’t for lack of effort. He flirted with nearly every female guest star, leaving the pillars of his marriage in question. Raymond was a womanizer and of the worst kind, too.
As the “man of the house,” Ray expected Debra to fulfil his needs and whims. While this was mostly played for laughs, sometimes, it could be downright uncomfortable to watch. It certainly casts a different light on Raymond as a person and makes it all the more unlikely that “everybody” loves the guy.
Another aspect of Ray’s relationship that might rub viewers the wrong way is how he always questions Debra’s every decision – including why she stays with him. From an outside perspective, their relationship just sounds catastrophically dysfunctional. Even in a comedy like this, you’ve got to wonder why don’t the characters simply file for divorce at this point. At the very least, it would have been a better course of action for Ray – the only time he did something for Debra’s sake.
2. FRANK BARONE IS THE WORST TV DAD (AND MARIE IS THE WORST MOM)
Why Everybody Loves Raymond Aged Badly
From misogynistic remarks to casual racism and everything in between, there’s no sin Frank Barone isn’t guilty of. An all-around curmudgeon, Frank’s unlikable character just makes the show feel all the more mean-spirited than usual. The worst part is that he, like his son, treats his wife like no more than an object.
Speaking of his wife, Marie Barone isn’t any sweeter than her husband. Naggy, nosy, and a nuisance to everyone around her, Marie is never seen as anything more than a mere joke for the show. While this might be a play on the whole idea that Raymond is just a live-action cartoon – see Married With Children – it does come off as a bit more mean-spirited than just that.
Perhaps it’s the combination of all the toxicity from the show that makes Marie’s character seem even worse than she already is. I mean, every show in the 80s and 90s had the nosy parent-in-law or neighbour. Alf had it with Raquel Ochmonek, and so did Seinfeld with Jerry’s mom, Helen. Come to think of it, they were both played by the amazing Liz Sheridan – a bit of a typecast there. But that’s beside the point.
