“People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever’s in the glass.”
“The Golden Girls” created history when it first premiered in 1985 setting the stage of strong-willed female characters who are aging gracefully with dignity. It is a treasure trove filled with humorous scenes and situations that will always be relevant to watch. I still rejoice in watching these spectacular women embrace life with full stride and the way they always strive to focus on the brighter side of life.
These 4 dynamic and awe-inspiring women taught us that age is indeed nothing more than a number and that we can set out to accomplish anything our heart desires at any time.
Whether it be Rose Nylund’s optimism and pure innocence towards approaching life or Blanche’s flirtatious and wild attitude, both are a great cocktail to have in life. On the other hand, the disciplinarian and erudite nature of Dorothy is also required in this exotic cocktail of unique personalities.
Even the adorable and happy-go-lucky spirit of Sophia will forever remain etched in our hearts, especially her classic romantic stories from Sicily.
So to revive the golden memories of these 4 phenomenal groundbreaking women, I’m listing 50 iconic quotes that will always make us jump with enthusiasm!
“Rose, I know this is a long shot, but did you take much acid during the sixties?” – Dorothy
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“I wonder if jewelry comes from Jewish people? In Little Falls, the jeweler was Jewish. Jeweler, Jewish—I wonder if there’s a connection.” – Rose
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“How long is this story?” – Sophia
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“It was at that moment I realized my bosoms had the power to make music.” – Blanche
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“My Mother Always Used To Say: The Older You Get, The Better You Get, Unless You’re A Banana.” – Rose
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“Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping.” – Blanche
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“Let me tell you a story. Sicily, 1912. Picture this” – Sophia
“It’s like we say in St. Olaf — Christmas without fruitcake is like St. Sigmund’s Day without the headless boy.” – Rose
“I could vomit just looking at you.” – Dorothy
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“Dorothy: I have a date. Blanche: With a man? Dorothy: No, Blanche. With a Venus Fly Trap.”
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“Well, nobody ever believes me when I’m telling the truth. I guess it’s the curse of every devastatingly beautiful woman.” – Blanche
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“People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever’s in the glass.” – Sophia
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“Rose: Tell me, is it possible to love two men at the same time. Blanche: Set the scene, have we been drinking?”
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“After 80, every year without a headstone is a milestone!” – Sophia
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“Grandma Hollingsworth always said I was a little flighty…or was it a little floozy?” – Blanche
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“Boy, I remember when I was a little girl, when we’d get depressed. Grandma could always cheer us up. She’d take out her dentures and she’d take a healthy swig from the aquarium, and then she’d put a flashlight under a chin, and we could watch the goldfish swim from cheek to cheek. We could have watched it all day… but visiting hours were only from ten to four.” – Rose
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“Where Are You Going?” “To Either Get Ice Cream Or Commit A Felony. I’ll Decide In The Car.” – Dorothy
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“I could get herpes listening to this story!” – Dorothy
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“No matter how bad things get, remember these sage words: You’re old, you sag, get over it.” -Sophia
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“My great-granddaddy always said that there are two things you never sell to a friend—a car and a slave—because if either one of them quits working you’ll never hear the end of it. Of course, they hanged my great-granddaddy. He said a lot of things he shouldn’t have.” — Blanche
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“You’ve given some of your finest performances in back alleys” – Dorothy
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“Let me tell you girls the three most important things I learned about life: number one, hold fast to your friends; number two, there’s no such thing as security; and number three, don’t go see Ishtar. Woof.” – Sophia
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“Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray for brains.” – Dorothy
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“I hate to admit it but he melts my Haagen-Dazs.” – Rose
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“Like I’m the only person who ever mixed a margarita in a sailor’s mouth?” – Blanche
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“It’s wonderful dating in Miami. Every single man under eighty sells cocaine.” – Dorothy
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“I’m jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo.” – Blanche
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“I will put a Sicilian curse on you that will be like hell on earth” – Sophia
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“You look more like a chicken when you’re angry.” – Rose
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“Life can turn around and spit in your face.” – Sophia
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“There is a fine line between having a good time and being a wanton slut. I know. My toe has been on that line.” – Blanche
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“It’s like you people don’t pay any attention to me whatsoever.” – Rose
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“Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppy. This ain’t gonna be no cakewalk!” – Sophia
“I’m not one to blow my own vertubenflugen.” – Rose
“I thought I was gonna die. I swear I have never felt such agony. I saw my entire life flash before my eyes and I thought, ‘What a shame if I die now, I’m too young…and I’m wearing the wrong underwear.” – Blanche
“It’s like life is a giant weenie roast, and I’m the biggest weenie!” – Rose
“If This Sauce Was A Person, I’d Get Naked And Make Love To It” – Sophia
“I know I look square, but I’m like my father’s tractor. I take a while to warm up, but once I get going I can turn your topsoil till the cows come home.” – Rose
“Dorothy: Rose, what are you listening to? Rose: A relaxation tape. The rain is supposed to relax me. Dorothy: Is it working? Rose: Not really. I keep worrying that I left my car windows down.”
“I eat raw cookie dough. And occasionally, I run through the sprinklers and don’t wear a bathing cap. And at Christmas, I’ve been known to put away more than one eggnog.” – Rose
“Excuse Me Rose, Have I Given Any Indication At All That I Care?” – Sophia
“I think there’s a connection between your brain and wallpaper paste.” – Sophia
“They were all buying T-shirts, you know, the ones that say, ‘Today is the first day of the end of your life.” – Dorothy
“Oh, Sophia. I want to explain about last night. When I was a little girl one summer we had a terrible thunderstorm…” – Rose
“I’ve been having a good time, and there wasn’t even a man in the room.” – Blanche
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“Dorothy: Oh, c’mon Blanche. Age is just a state of mind. Blanche: Tell that to my thighs.”
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“I’m an old white woman. I’m not supposed to have color. You want color? Talk to Lena Horne.” – Sophia
“Jealousy is an ugly thing, Dorothy. And so are you, in anything backless.” – Sophia
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“Calm Down, Honey.” – Blanche
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“You know what they say: you can lead a herring to water, but you have to walk really fast or he’ll die.” – Rose
SEE MORE: ‘Golden Girls’ is back — but for some, it never left
