By Tamar Braxton
In 2017, I was quietly preparing for one of the most beautiful blessings I could imagine — a baby girl.
We were so excited. Vince and I were already parents to our incredible son, Logan, and the thought of bringing a daughter into the world filled me with a kind of joy that’s hard to explain. I pictured her tiny fingers, her first steps, and the day I’d hear her call me “Mommy.” But sometimes, life has a way of shaking us when we least expect it.
I suffered a miscarriage, and in that moment, everything shattered. The dreams, the plans, the little clothes I had already picked out — gone. I was devastated in a way I didn’t know I could be. It wasn’t just the loss of a pregnancy. It was the loss of a future I had already started loving.
Infertility isn’t something we talk about enough, especially as women of color. There’s so much silence, so much shame that we carry around. But I’ve always promised myself — and my fans — that I’d be honest, even when it hurts. And the truth is, I’ve struggled. I’ve prayed. I’ve hoped. And I’ve cried — a lot.
But even in the pain, I held on to possibility. I decided to freeze my eggs. I did it for me. I did it for Vince. I did it because I believe that just because the timing wasn’t right then, doesn’t mean it’s over forever.
I don’t know what the future holds. Maybe one day I’ll try again. Maybe I’ll meet the daughter I once dreamed about in another chapter of my life. What I do know is that I still carry her in my heart. Her spirit — though never seen — changed me. She made me softer. Stronger. She made me a better mother, even if she never got to meet me earthside.
To anyone who’s ever felt this pain: you are not alone. Your loss is real. Your grief is valid. And your hope — it’s allowed to stay, even when your heart feels broken.
This is my story, and I’m still writing it. With love. With faith. And always, with the belief that the best parts of my journey may still be ahead.
— Tamar
