Chicago P.D. Season 13, Episode 19 ‘Going Back’ focuses once again on Adam Ruzek and the decline of Disco Bob. It’s a much-needed episode because, due to Patrick Flueger’s break, we’ve barely had good Adam content this season. And we’ve barely had Burzek content, either. But it’s also a more or less depressing episode, despite the moments of levity brought by Makayla being very much a teenager, the moments of domesticity that we love between Adam and Kim, and the way Kim takes charge in the absence of Voight.
The reality of Alzheimer’s disease is this, and it’s heartbreaking. It’s a little bit like losing someone piece by piece, every day. And yet a part of you is somehow glad because they’re still around, while also being cognizant of the fact that in many ways, they’re not. The version you’re getting is not fully them. But what’s the alternative? Letting go?
Of course, the fact that Disco Bob doesn’t remember a lot of things is merely the setup for what happens to Adam, which gets the team involved in the investigation. And by the team, I mean Kim, Kevin, and Imani (and and and Trudy is back!!) because budget cuts! We’re not even going to go into all the illegal stuff that was happening in that motel, or all the rules Adam broke to figure that out, because these are TV cops, and some level of suspension of disbelief is needed to make most of what happens work.
Including, but not limited to the dude at the motel coming back seemingly to finish the job, only to find that Adam doesn’t remember. Obviously, he’s not the killer in the video, because this is a TV show and things cannot be that easy. Adam and the team do find the killer, though, because again, TV show. And because everyone needed a win.
‘Going Back’ moves fast, and it particularly works as a study of family and the power of memory. If it all hits hard, it’s because Patrick Flueger sells a confused Adam, both in the bewilderment around what he can even expect or want out of his father and the more immediate chaos after getting hit. But it also really does a good job of showcasing all the ways Adam takes after his father, and how sometimes, all you need is someone to give you a hand when you’re down.
But even this temporary win doesn’t change the reality of Adam’s life, or what’s happening to Disco Bob. Nothing can change that. Nothing can turn back time. Life is fleeting, and all we can do is attempt to live it the best we can and hang onto the memories we’ve made with the people we love for as long as we can.
When Adam says, “It’s okay, you can let go,” to his dad, that doesn’t mean he wants that to happen. It doesn’t mean he’ll be okay. It just means that, sometimes, the best thing you can do for the people you love is let them know that you can carry on, even if they’re not around. For them and for you. Because that’s what they would have wanted.
Agree? Disagree? What did you think of Chicago P.D. Season 13, Episode 19 ‘Going Back’? Share with us in the comments below! And if you have your own opinion on the show, leave a review/rating on our Chicago P.D. hub!