Everybody Loves Raymond is a well-liked sitcom but the show had its fair share of problematic flaws that many fans chose to ignore.
frank and marie and ray and debra
While there were many comedic sitcoms in the ’80s, ’90s, and even early 2000s, one that made a big impact and had many fans was Everybody Loves Raymond. People found the Barones hilarious, and obviously exaggerated for comedic impact, but also relatable. However, while there are many hilarious things about the show, there are also parts of it that don’t hold up well to the modern-day.
Many of the problems on the show weren’t even recognized at first because they seemed normal for the time, but fans have noticed some major flaws as the years have gone on. But, there are also many fans who ignore these issues for the positive.
The Family Is Shown As Endearing
A family photo in Everybody Loves Raymond
Most sitcoms are going to be pretty extreme in their jokes and stereotypes, so we all know they aren’t to be completely taken seriously. While Everybody Loves Raymond seeks to show that even imperfect families can have love for each other, the way they treated each other was consistently awful. So the fact that so many people thought they were endearing is kind of messed up.
Ray Is An Absent Parent
Ray Romano as Ray Barone in Everybody Loves Raymond
In many ways, the show illustrates that people often do better than their parents when it comes to raising kids. Ray is definitely a more caring and kind parent than Frank and Marie were to him, but he’s also not all that present. He is the parent that works which means he’s not going to be around as much, but he’s always leaving most of the childcare to Debra and sees being with his kids as “babysitting.”
Marie’s Treatment Of Debra
Everybody Loves Raymond
One of the funniest and longest-running jokes and storylines on the show is the way Marie doesn’t like Debra and always judges her. This is a dynamic that many people can relate to, and it is definitely rather hilarious at times. However, the way Marie treats Debra, and the way that Ray condones the behavior, is pretty extreme. Marie was way too controlling and also weirdly obsessed with her own son.
Frank Is An All-Around Bad Person
Frank Barone in Grandpa Steals episode of Everybody Loves Raymond
Frank probably has some of the funniest ones longest from the entire series, but he’s not a good person. While it’s not like Marie is all that much better, Frank is all-around kind of nasty. He’s judgemental, hateful, and mean. He treats both his wife and kids with a lot of disdain, but it doesn’t stop there.
He’s judgemental of others and has a mean comment for nearly anyone he interacts with. He’s supposed to be seen as hilarious, but he’s just miserable.
It’s Incredibly Sexist
Everybody Loves Raymond Ray and Debra AIS
It comes as no surprise that Everybody Loves Raymond is a sexist series. Many of the sitcoms in this style from decades past were, and they often reflected attitudes of the time period. The Barones are fairly traditional in their family dynamics, but this isn’t the biggest issue. The men objectify women often and don’t see their wives as equal partners. They never want to help them, and Ray’s constant nagging of Debra for sex is really uncomfortable.
Robert Is Obsessive About Debra
Even though Robert has a good job and is a successful adult, he has a ton of self-esteem issues. While he can’t even be entirely blamed given how his family treats him, as an adult, he’s responsible for figuring things out. His obsession with competing with Ray is unhealthy, but the way it translates into lusting after Debra is even worse. He even cares more about Debra at times than Amy, his own wife.
Franke And Marie Were Terrible Parents
The show does make it clear that Ray and Robert didn’t have perfect parents, and they have many valid complaints about the way they were raised. While some of these behaviors might have been more normalized at the time, that doesn’t make them okay.
Marie was too controlling and involved in her son’s lives, and she also favored Ray so much. Frank, for his part, was overly strict and not very loving at all. So, it’s no wonder the boys had issues.
Debra And Ray Barely Like Each Other
Everybody Loves Raymond Debra Bet with Kids against Ray
Compared to Frank and Marie’s relationship, Debra and Ray seem positively healthy. However, it’s not the best example of a loving marriage. These two fall into pretty much every sexist stereotype of men and women in sitcoms. Ray never helps with housework and only wants sex while Debra is forced to nag him and condescend to him all the time.
There’s Practically Zero Diversity
Barone family in Everybody Loves Raymond
This isn’t a problem just with Everybody Loves Raymond as many popular sitcoms, such as Friends, were also really white. However, it’s a trend that’s worth pointing out. While the Barones are an Italian American family, there aren’t really any other characters of color at all. They could have included more diversity with friends or the people Robert dated, but this didn’t happen.
Frank And Marie’s Relationship Is Abusive
Frank and Marie Barone in Everybody Loves Raymond
While Debra and Ray don’t have a great relationship and they don’t’ always treat each other well, they are leaps and bounds better than Frank and Marie. The way that Frank talks to Marie is pretty much emotional and verbal abuse, and she isn’t that nice to him either. They both seem to hate one another, and they are vocal about it. It starts to get more depressing than funny, but so many fans see it as just a big joke.
