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Frank Barone, played by the late Peter Boyle, was Ray and Robert’s surly father on the sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond. He served in the U.S. Army in the ’50s during the Korean War, then married Marie and they had their two boys. He often recalled his time growing up as well as serving in the war.
But mostly, he enjoyed retired life after working as a bookkeeper and police officer (though he was still reportedly a registered real estate agent.) There were a number of things about the character of Frank on the popular show, however, that just wouldn’t fly today.
Being An Absentee Father
Times were very different when Ray and Robert were growing up. But today, the idea of an absentee father just wouldn’t fly. With dual incomes being commonplace in households now, and even ones where mom works and dads stays home with the kids, the expectations on fathers are much higher.
So, the idea of Frank not really being there for his kids while they were growing up would be frowned upon in today’s landscape, even if it was just the way things were back in the ’60s.
Physically Abusive Upbringing
Frank Barone defends Debra at the lodge in Everybody Loves Raymond
While Frank was never physically abusive with his children, he openly discussed how his own father and grandfather were both heavy-handed and abusive disciplinarians. This style of parenting is a complete no-no nowadays.
Because of the way he was raised, Frank made a promise to himself to never treat his own kids that way.
Calling Himself Weak For Not Being Abusive
Frank Barone in Pet the Bunny episode of Everybody Loves Raymond
Interestingly, while Frank was proud that he did not physically abuse his children like his father did to him and his grandfather to his father, he also viewed this as a weakness. He once told his boys that he was “always weaker than” his father, clearly something his father made him feel was true.
However, Robert replied with something that reassured Frank this was not the case at all. “Maybe you didn’t want to be like him,” he said.
Laziness
Sure, Frank was retired and he worked hard his whole life, so he earned the chance to relax and do nothing whenever he wanted to. But he was often seen lounging around in an armchair at his own home or at Ray and Debra’s with his pants undone watching TV or reading the newspaper.
But he also expected his wife Marie to do so much for him, which meant that while she was “retired” as well, she was still up and cooking, cleaning, and doing other chores 24/7 while he did nothing.
Treatment Of Marie
They were from a completely different generation when things were different: the men went to work and the wives cooked, cleaned, and took care of the home and the children. But even though the series took place in modern times, Frank still lived the old-fashioned way.
Sure, Marie was happy to fit in her usual role. But he would bark at her to make him food or bring him something as though she was his servant and not his wife.
Insulting People
Everybody Loves Raymond Frank and Marie Barone
Frank had no filter. If he had something to say, he would say it. If he didn’t like you or what you were doing, he would tell you.
This wasn’t just limited to friends and family. He would even insult strangers. And, most jarringly, his own wife Marie, even once calling her “nuts” and another time asking puzzlingly what contest he won if she was supposed to be his trophy wife. Pretty much everything that came out of his mouth was either negative or insulting.
His Definition Of Being A Man
Frank Barone in Grandpa Steals episode of Everybody Loves Raymond
To Frank, being a man meant being rough and tough. He believed that his time serving in the war is what made him a man, clearly a product of his upbringing with an abusive father.
Because of this, he would often make fun of Ray and Robert, calling them feminine names like Nancy, Shirley, Peaches, and Mary, using the monikers as insults to suggest that his two sons didn’t live up to his definition of what a real man should be.
His Uber-Conservative Views
Everybody Loves Raymond Frank Barone Trophy Wife
The world is a much more open and accepting place these days, and Frank’s overly conservative values would not fly today. He would often use offensive terms and phrases, like calling products that don’t work “Japanese crap.” He was also vocally against gays, lesbians, hippies, Koreans, and the Japanese.
His ridiculous behavior and racist and offensive views stretched so far that he even outright refused to eat oriental food and refused to accept anything that wasn’t considered “normal” by his archaic standards.
Teasing Marie About Other Women
Marie and Frank Barone in Everybody Loves Raymond
It was clear that Frank had great affection for Marie and she was the only one for him. However, he still made an effort to try and make her feel bad by talking about his supposed attraction to her bridge partner, Harriet Lichmann.
He also made inappropriate comments about his own daughter-in-law Debra, saying he “likes this show” when they show up unexpectedly at Ray and Debra’s house and see Debra dressed provocatively.
Didn’t Teach His Granddaughter Good Values
Frank and Ally Barone in Everybody Loves Raymond
While Frank had a soft spot for his granddaughter Ally, he didn’t always teach her the best values. He was upset one time when he thought she was being bullied at school, then proud of her when he found out she was the bully as he believed that meant she was tough.
On another occasion, he fought with another man at the grocery store which made Ally scared. He did try to make things right so she wouldn’t be scared anymore, but it wasn’t a good thing to do in the first place.
