“How Ray Romano Made Everyday Life Hilarious in Everybody Loves Raymond”

With such a snappy title as Everybody Loves Raymond, it’s no wonder so many viewers were interested in the show’s storylines, characters, and comedy. The phrase immediately piques a potential audience member’s curiosity: who is Raymond, why does everybody love him, and does he live up to the expectations? Strangely enough, the main character’s actor wasn’t in love with the title. In a 2022 interview with Larry King, actor and comedian Ray Romano shared the reasons why he felt that Everybody Loves Raymond wasn’t the best title for the series in which he starred.

‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ Doesn’t Fit the Character

In the March before the seventh season of the show aired, the cast of Everybody Loves Raymond joined King for an interview to talk about behind-the-scenes details, careers before the show, and the relationships on set. King brought up a rumor that Romano wasn’t the biggest fan of the title of the show, and Romano confirmed the rumor to be true. “First of all,” Romano stated, “you’re a stand-up comic, you have very low self-esteem to begin with.” Before creating Everybody Loves Raymond, Romano had been working as a stand-up comedian. It’s a staple for many comedians to use self-deprecating jokes, and Romano is no exception.

Following his appearance on David Letterman, the producer of the Letterman show, Rob Burnett, reached out to Romano about creating a show based on his life, family, and humor. Not long after that, the show was pitched to CBS, the casting was finished, and Everybody Loves Raymond was airing on TV. However, even though Romano impressed Burnett with his comedy, low self-esteem follows Romano’s character, Ray Barone, into the show. Whereas his brother Robert (Brad Garrett) often mutters the title of the show under his breath, the main character who “everybody loves” doesn’t share the same high regard for himself. In that way, the title doesn’t necessarily match the character.

Romano continued in the Larry King interview: “It was a title that…invites hatred. Who is this guy? Let’s see how I love him. I was worried about that.” When it comes to writing and characterization, it’s best to show the audience why they should love a character through behavior, actions, and personality, rather than simply telling the audience to connect with this character. When you boil it down, it comes down to the all-important balance between showing and telling. Ideally, it’s best to do both — without showing, there’s no proof to back up what you tell the audience about a character, and things can get confusing for an audience without a certain degree of exposition.

However, telling the audience that “everybody loves Raymond” in the title is potentially asking for pushback. No one likes being told what to do, and thinking that a character is used to everyone loving him could place assumptions in a viewer’s mind before even seeing the show. Ray Barone doesn’t agree with the title most of the time, but a new audience member wouldn’t know that and might wrongfully assign arrogance to the character. Titles can be tricky to choose, and this one began as a placeholder for the show that stuck around until finalization. Despite Romano disliking the title, he told King, “I’m learning to live with it now.”

The cast interview shed light on a lot of details regarding the show, including the origin of the phrase “everybody loves Raymond.” Romano stated, “[The title] came from a sarcastic comment my brother made, who is a police officer. And he said, ‘Look what I do for a living, and look at Raymond. Yeah, everybody loves Raymond.’” The sarcasm of Romano’s brother Richard Romano, a retired NYPD sergeant, laid the groundwork not just for the title of the show but for many of the main themes and premises. Rather than just being a one-off comparison, a jab between brothers, the phrase was changed to be Robert’s jealous and morose catchphrase. The sibling rivalry was highlighted for the show, and from there, Robert’s character began to flourish into something completely different from his inspiration.

Much of the extra personality given to the characterizations are defined by the actors in the cast. For instance, Garrett’s spin on the Everybody Loves Raymond character was a wonderful addition to the show and formed the basis for some interesting character dynamics. However, the brother character was not entirely true to Ray Romano. As Romano said in the interview: “[Brad] came in and brought this character to it… My brother is, like I say, a cop, 5’11” with an attitude, and Brad brought this slant to it…at the time, [my brother] would take a lot of stuff from the other cops. They think it’s a documentary.”

Besides Richard Romano getting teased by his coworkers, the show had other unintended side effects, as it created a bit of conflict between Ray Romano and his mother. “In the beginning,” Romano told King, “I took a lot of heat from my mother for the way my brother was portrayed.” Many of the characters are given flaws that keep them from being perfect parallels to their real-life inspirations. This practice makes for good storytelling, but it also has real-world effects when it comes to the people the characters are based on. Taking inspiration from real life is an important part of the writing process — it adds a level of realism and unique qualities. For instance, focusing on Ray’s family as the center point of the show led to some truly hilarious and memorable moments. The characters have an added layer of depth that comes from their counterparts in the real world.